I went deep, deep, deep into the vault for this one. Spooky Season means you get a spooky “My Life as a Horror Story”.
Content Warning: Thoughts of Suicide
In 2016, my sister was doing a project for one of the communications courses in her undergrad program. The theme was mental health, and she was asking for submissions of all kinds. I offered to submit a small piece of poetry with an accompanying image.
Now, 2016 was a good year for me, all things considered. I had recently graduated from my Master’s program, and soon after I started dating my husband. I was hanging out with friends more often, figuring out what I wanted to do with my life, and feeling pretty good. But prior to that year, my mental health had been at its worse. Before doing my Master’s degree (and even during part of the program) I was not okay.
So this little piece came from those dark times and even darker thoughts. I am happy report that my mental health is leagues better than what it was back then, although the memories still haunt me.
Enjoy, and Happy Spooky Season. Sending a virtual hug to all those who need it right now.
Hollow inside
Nothing to do but lay on the floor and cry
Wondering if I will maybe die
Fight or flight
Should I give in or look for a little light
Wondering if I will make it through the night
Useless Feeling
Hold my breath or breathe too much until my head is reeling
Wondering if this is all there is to being
Will it end alright
Options, emotions weaving in and out of sight
Wondering if I just might…
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
From Ottawa Public Health:
If you or someone you know is in distress, please call one of the numbers below right away (24 Hour Help Lines):
- Ottawa Mental Health Crisis Line (EN/FR) : 613-722-6914, 1-866-996-0991 if outside Ottawa
- Distress Centre of Ottawa and Region (EN) : 613-238-3311
- Youth Services Bureau 24/7 Crisis Line (EN/FR) : 613-260-2360 or 1-877-377-7775 (Eastern ON)
- Kids Help Phone (EN) : 1-800-668-6868
- Centre d’aide 24/7 (FR) : 1-866-277-3553
- Tel-aide Outaouais (FR) : 613-741-6433
