Is this Flasher story based on real intrusive thoughts that I have had? Maybe. Maybe not. You’ll never know. But don’t worry – as always, the cat is okay. The human… Not so much.
~ ~ ~
“Such a lovely lady,” he said. “Beautiful lady.”
The cat brushed up against his legs, lifting her head up to his outstretched palm, purring.
“Oh, you want scritches?”
She was a beautiful cat with a smooth, calico coat. When he first met her, an image flashed in his mind. No, not an image. More like a movie. A shaky reel of him bashing her on the head with the spoon he had just removed from the kitchen drawer. In the daydream, she died instantly and without pain. In reality, it would not be that simple if he chose to follow through.
No. It was unacceptable to act upon intrusive thoughts like that. Only a monster would hurt an animal. A cat doesn’t know if it’s done something wrong. Even if it has, that’s not something you can explain to them. Not like a cat would ever commit a crime or do something out of spite. No, cats (and dogs) are angels upon the earth and must be treated as such.
Now, humans…
“Who the fuck are you?!” She stood in the doorway, mouth agape, grocery bag slipping from her arms. “How did you get in here?! I’m calling the police!”
But she wasn’t fast enough to dial the number on her phone. No one ever was.
Abandoning his new calico friend, he pounced on the woman, spoon in hand. He bopped her in the centre of the forehead; not to cause any harm, but to surprise and stun. He readjusted his grip on the spoon and got to work.
She didn’t start screaming right away. The shock was too much. He almost had the first eyeball worked free before an ungodly wail burst from her lips.
“So annoying,” he said, rolling his eyes.
He readjusted himself to position his left forearm over her open mouth. He leaned into it, putting all his wait into muffling her cries. One time, he broke someone’s jaw by accident doing that and he hoped one day he’d be able to achieve that same result. But the eyes were more important.
By the time he scooped both of them out, she was unconscious. Her empty sockets stared up at him, bloodied and misshapen. Unfortunately, her jaw did not appear to be broken.
He sat up, sitting on her abdomen like it was a cushion, and scooped up his prize. The gorgeous calico starred back at him with deep amber eyes, licking her lips. She was still purring.
“I don’t typically share,” he said, glancing at the eyes in his palm. He looked back up at the cat as she advanced towards him. “Then again, I’m not used to having such wonderful company.”
He placed one of the eyeballs at her feet, careful not to get blood on the white parts of her fur. He popped the other eyeball into his mouth and bit down. It burst like a ripe cherry tomato. As he chewed, he watched his new friend claim her share of the spoils and his heart filled with love.
